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Random Freeway Encounter of the Day

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It’s 2:45, September 26th and I’m traveling North on the 405 near the Sunset Blvd. exit in my Porsche, doing my guaranteed-to-suck Friday commute home at a brisk 0-20 MPH in heavy traffic.  I’m in the #3 lane and there’s a newish Audi S8 in front of me, I’m a good car or two car distances from him.  All of a sudden I see this Audi shutter, but don’t think anything of it - god knows the 405 is littered with potholes.  Then I saw a lady in the passenger seat look behind the car at me and again I thought nothing of it.  This Audi then proceeded to start going very very slow, so I go to the #2 lane to pass him thinking “WTF is wrong with this guy?!”.  I’m blaring Metro Station in a total “commuting zone”.  I see that he’s pacing me on the right, so I look over and the dude in the Audi is making a hand gesture for me to pull over (again I’m like, “WTF?!”).  I turn down the music and hear him say, “you hit me, pull over.”  I replied, “I didn’t hit you!”  He then insists I hit him and tells me I need to pull over.  I proceed to exit at the Moraga exit following Sunset and pull into the gas station.  

My head was immediately clouded with negative thoughts like “how did I hit this guy and not even realize it?”, “how the fuck am I going to pay for this!” or the “I need to cut down on my drinking!”   We pull into the Chevron off the exit.  I grab my wallet and insurance info and proceed to exit my car and he is parked right behind me. I immediately go examine my front bumper for “damage”.  What do I find: nada, jack shit - I look at his bumper with him and find no damage, just a McCain 08 sticker. 

I should have told this old douchebag with his trophy Pinay mail-order bride that he was a complete ass.  Instead he thanked me for pulling over and I went about my commute in utter fucking astonishment.  God I hate the 405!

Written by Mike Waldron

September 26th, 2008 at 5:35 am

Posted in Life

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